It’s that time of the year again that all parents are desperately looking forward to. If you have no idea what I am talking about, then obviously your children are not of school-grade age anymore. In that case, let this serve as a blissful stroll down memory lane. For the rest of us living in the modern age of Hunger Games: Back to School Edition, it’s go time! We all knew this time was coming and most of us were too busy enjoying the summer months to think it would be over so soon. For me, it’s a bit of mixed emotions. Like many (or all parents) I am ecstatic that these kids have gone back to school and are back in that structured routine. BUT I also love the fact that in summer we can pick up and go whenever we like. Regardless, me and our bank account were ready for our snack-eating monsters to go back to school. If it hasn’t hit you already then in the coming weeks it will be the chaos of class orientations, teacher meet & greets, school supply lists, uniforms, and endless trips to the stores for things forgotten. Let’s not down play the struggle to get these kids back into a school routine. As parents, especially moms, it’s important that we feel a sense of control and stability during a transitional time. This is a happy time, and you shouldn’t be going crazy in the Back-to-School madness! Also, I truly believe that when we as adults feel secure in the things going on around us it gives our kids the same sense of security and structure. There's no special secret cure to surviving this lovely time of year but there are things you can try to do to make the transitions smoother and ensure you're still taking care of yourself physically and mentally!
Set Bedtimes
This one is my favorite and honestly (in my opinion) one of the most important. We have always set bedtimes in our home for the boys, but I can admit that in the past I had been much more flexible with them staying up later, especially on the weekends. I was shocked to realize how many parents don’t have set bedtimes in their homes. Do you all like to be tortured?You spend all day either at a job or doing some type of work, running errands, or extracurricular activities, and then get home to cook/eat, get ready for the next day, and do one of the fifty
million things pending. When do you get time for yourself? If this is a two-parent house, then when do you get time to spend with your partner? Having a set bedtime in place not only gives your child structure and ensures they get sufficient sleep, but it also ensures you get some sort of time at the end of the day to decompress. You shouldn’t be going to bed while your body and mind are still on level 100 from your day. Your partner deserves to have some quality time with you after a long day too. A “bedtime” means so much more than depriving your children of staying up until some crazy hour of the night.
Schedules
A word we should all live by…BOUNDARIES. Schedules help set up healthy boundaries for you and your kids. When school starts that’s when sports typically start again, along with after-school events, social events, and personal commitments. Like I said at the beginning of this, we did a lot of these things during summer, but we had a bunch more flexibility. Setting a schedule now is the top priority. This will help you keep all your obligations in order so nothing is forgotten but it will also help keep a clear line to things you need to say no to.
Now just to be clear I’m not just saying to keep a schedule of the things about the kids. I’m talking about keeping a schedule of everything, including your daily personal goals. It is easy to forget about the things that are important to us when there are so many other things that need our attention. If you have committed yourself to going for a run 3 times a week then that needs to be scheduled too! So, when little Joey’s mom from school invites you to come over for a playdate and you see that’s your running hour, you’ll have to respectfully decline. The few things we get to do for ourselves during a busy week are just as important as the rest of our parental obligations.
Delegate Responsibilities
In my opinion, if your child is at least 2-3 years old you can start having them help with small tasks during the week that will help them get ready either for the day or the next day. Now hear me out, I know this may sound crazy having a toddler participate in getting things done but I’m telling you it works! Now, like anything else with children most of the time and depending on what we have asked them to do, the first couple of times that they “help” is chaos and more work for us. If you stay consistent, I promise you they will get the hang of it, and it will become so easy. For example, our 3-year-old loves to help (we are in that independent, “I can do it myself” stage) so his older brother has to clean the dinner table every night and insists on helping him. So, to avoid fighting about the table I started giving our toddler a wipe to clean the kitchen island (where he sits most of the time anyway so it’s usually his mess). Do I have to still wipe the table down?
Yes, of course, but everyone is helping clean up in the areas they help make messes in. After a few times, they start to realize the more mess I make the more I must clean. Same thing with their toys. If they want to dump the toy bin…be my guest…but they already know they are responsible for picking up every toy they dump! For our oldest, he has a chore chart that he’s responsible for keeping up with. Think about what system works best for your home and what motivates your kids but definitely delegate responsibility to ease some of the load from yourself.
Transitional times like back to school are challenging but there are things that you can do to avoid going crazy! These are just a few things that we have tried and have been very successful in our home. No matter what you try to implement in your home just remember that structure and consistency are the keys to getting through a transitional period. Whether your little one is already back in school or getting ready to go back, I hope all of your kiddos have an amazing and successful school year.
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